The entire world has just involuntarily adopted my lifestyle of quarantining at home, worrying about germs and wondering if we will be alive in 2 months. It is amazing how a virus, a little strand of RNA that is not even technically alive, brought the world to its knees. The threat of SARS-CoV2 has shifted everything. I was hoping that right after writing this blog post I would be booking trips. Bruce took spring quarter at 50%time, we planned to visit Italy and take a biking trip in Seattle. Boy do I know how to pick a vacation spot! And of course, Oxford, to lobby the related research groups on Cannabinoid Oncology. Now, for what is likely my last remission, I will be stuck at home. Don't get me wrong, I have a beautiful house and garden, which I so grateful for. But I have been on soft quarantine during most of last year during chemo. And now, just as my immunity is recovering the entire planted is on lockdown for longer than anyone wants to admit. It is not how I wanted to spend my year.
During this last testing period, I cut back my dosing, hoping to find the bare minimum of Cannabinoids that would keep Porlock knocked back. My blood work showed a tiny increase in my CA125, from 2.9 to 4.2. So it seems I need to up my dose a bit. I will try a new regime of 3xDay to keep the levels in my bloodstream consistent, totalling about 25 MG THC along with many mg of THCA, CBD, CBDA and CBG. It has been difficult to stick to a precise dosing regime as my medication supply has been "interrupted" and I was forced to change products. More on that in a later post.
What is my prognosis if I catch COVID 19. On paper, I only have a year to live. In a pandemic, when a crush of patients are clogging the hospital, would they even try and save me? Almost every way I look at the current situation it feels like I am on a sinking ship. The walls are closing in. The enemy is at the gate. The germs are everywhere. My naturally pollyannish brain has been in overdrive desperately trying to spin this into a positive. It may sound weird but the fact that I could die of this new virus is actually, in a twisted way, hopeful? I have spent the last four years preparing to die of cancer. But the chance, even remote, that I could die of something else just shows nothing is predestined. We do not know what the future brings, so I try to find hope and march on. And by marching on I mean pacing around the kitchen and living room, in between washing my hands.
If you want to geek out on the science of pandemics, here are a few links that I have found interesting in the past three weeks..... short animated video explaining Social Distancing
A fabulous pandemic daily update video. Some days he gets technical, but always concise and clear, with well-curated primary source links.
A great pandemic Modeling paper
A housekeeping note. PostHope is closing this website in 3 months. In the coming weeks I will move the blog to www.Schedule1Movie.Com And speaking of the movie, well, that certainly didn't turn out how I wanted. The premiere was scheduled for the last weekend in LA, the website suggests it was going ahead as planned, with extra cleaning. I wonder if anyone was actually in attendance. I will let schedule 1 sit on the shelf a bit and put in on youtube in a few weeks when the world is sick of obsessing about COVID. But anyone who wants the link and password just email me.
Virtual hug, MK